The Genocide of Battered Mothers and their Children

Archive for June, 2010|Monthly archive page

ACTION ALERT: Ways and Means to Preserve Fatherhood — Reply Today! LET THEM KNOW HOW THE FATHERHOOD IS BEING USED TO ABUSE WOMEN AND CHILDREN DEADLINE JULY 1, 2010

In : PAAO, Parent Alienation, Parental Alienation and Hostile Aggressive Parenting Awareness Day, Parental Alienation Awareness Day, Parental Alienation Awareness Organization, Abusers Denier, American citizen or Japanese??, AMPP-American Mothers Political Party, Australian Mothers Political Party, Angry fathers, Battered Mothers Custody Conference, Breaking The Silence; Children's Stories, child abuse, Child Custody, Childrens Rights, corrupt bastards, Court Appointed Parenting Evaluators and Guardians Ad Litem: Practical Realities and an Argument for Abolition, Court whores for profit, Custody Hell, domestic law, Domestic Violence,Domestic Violence,Domestic Violence,Domestic Violence,, Don Hoffman, family court corruption, Judge David Debenham, M. Jill Dykes, misogynists, mother rights, parental alienation, protective parent, Rape, restraining orders, woman haters. Jason P Hoffman,, Don Hoffman, family court corruption, Judge David Debenham, M. Jill Dykes, misogynists, mother rights, parental alienation, protective parent, Rape, restraining orders, woman haters. Jason P Hoffman,, Dr Richard Warshak, Dr. Richard Gardner, Father of Parental Alienation Syndrome (PAS) Committed Suicide May 25, 2003, family court corruption, Fathers & Families, Glenn Sacks, ACFC, RADAR, ANCPR, fathers murdering, Fathers Rights, Kansas House Representive Melvin Neufeld . Ks Wefare Summit, Kansas State House, SRS, CPS, Kansas Joint Committee on Children’s Issues on Nov 30, 2009 in Topeka, Kansas Legislature, Covenant Marriages, Domestic Violence, BULLSHIT LAWS, KS SRS Making money Jailing Children, Maternal Deprivation, Domestic Violence By Proxy, Motherhood, Motherless America, Mothers Rights, Murder-Suicide, PAAO, Parent Alienation, Parental Alienation and Hostile Aggressive Parenting Awareness Day, Parental Alienation Awareness Day, Parental Alienation Awareness Organization, Abusers Denier, Angry father on June 30, 2010 at 5:49 pm

 

Let’sGetHonestBlog

{{again, “noncustodial parents” are increasingly WOMEN, but is code for “FATHERs.”}}

Provide a submission HERE

_____________

The last post was leading into this one, as I mentioned “Fatherhood” and then posted a reply to a review of the latest book by a woman who fled Islam to the Netherlands, then to the United States, and who I’ve mentioned on my blog before (Ayaan Hirsi Ali).  I have not gone through anything like — well in quality — her life experience, but am going through similar re-evaluation (ongoing) of my allegiance to the monotheistic religion I have all my life felt represented the truth, beauty, and transcendence I knew as a child in Nature, and as an adolescent in art, and which I felt personally coherent in attributing to “God.”

TODAY — pros and cons, submit your “testimony” in print.  Is the pie in the sky going to stop the constant drainage of blood, sorrow, rape, kidnapping, degradation of humanity, bitterness, and other features of the supposed “human condition” beginning in sin til redeemed by bloodshed or repentance to acknowledging one’s sin, one way or another?? 

Here’s the FEDERAL discussion of “FATHERHOOD” — again, find a woman present in the witnesses or panelists, if you can:
June 17, 2010

Hearing to Review Responsible Fatherhood Programs
B-318 Rayburn House Office Building – beginning at 10:00 AM
(June 17th, 2010)

FOCUS OF THE HEARING: 
The hearing will [did] focus on the effectiveness of Responsible Fatherhood Programs in improving the relationship between non-custodial parents and their children, as well as their ability to provide financial support.  \

{{again, “noncustodial parents” are increasingly WOMEN, but is code for “FATHERs.”}}

Provide a submission HERE

Find a female on the Panelists, either Panel 1 or Panel 2. 

Remember, this is an off-shoot of 1994 & 1995 (Clinton era, folks!), 1998 & 1999 male offence that children wake up in homes without fathers in them.  Particularly African-American children, what else is new. 

I cannot blog completely (time, and personal issues), but commend to us today, more “fathers” that got their kids back. 

THIS one (Father tries to sell baby for $25, is beaten by inmates, etc.) shows a man with a domestic violence background (not to mention drug, not to mention, his 6 yr old removed from his home.  No problem, he finds another woman through a drug deal, impregnates HER (age difference, 18 years) and they BOTh try to sell their offspring.  Notably, the 6 yr old who was removed was the son of his ex-wife, against whom he committed domestic violence.  SOMEHOW, though that child (after jail for DV?) ended up in HIS household, or his Mommy & Daddy’s.. 

Man accused of trying to sell baby beaten in jail

Jun 28, 2010 Inmates beat dad in baby-for-sale case (AP) – Jail officials in California say afather accused of trying to sell his baby for $25
http://www.wane.com/…/man-accused-of-trying-to-sell-baby-beaten-in-jail-ob10-jgr_34582168 hours ago

Faustek/Tomasini

Even inmates get outraged at THAT>

Here’s another enraged stepfather, Schlager.  This one, good luck disentangling father, stepfather, stepdaughter — and where’s BIOLOGICAL MOM?


Gunman had criminal past

Jun 22, 2010 Article:Gunman had criminal past:/c/a/2010/06/22/BA2C1E3A7H. Police said Schlager hadan extensive

Parental Alienation Syndrome (PAS) Stuart Showalter Neo Nazi-Fathers Rights Advocate-Abusers Rights Advocate Glenn Sacks-Abusers Advocate,Right Wing Terrorist- Fathers Rights. Warren Farrell, Mike J Murphy, Jeremy Swanson, Mark K Godbey, Donald Tenn, Stan Rains, Richard A. Gardner coined the term Parental Alienation Syndrome

WordPress Tags: ACTION,ALERT,Ways,Means,Preserve,ABUSE,WOMEN,CHILDREN,DEADLINE,LetGetHonestBlog,Private,Matter,System,woman,Islam,Netherlands,Ayaan,Hirsi,life,evaluation,allegiance,religion,truth,Nature,testimony,degradation,features,human,repentance,Here,FEDERAL,discussion,June,Review,Responsible,Rayburn,House,Office,FOCUS,relationship,code,Provide,submission,Find,Panelists,Panel,Remember,Clinton,folks,male,African,American,kids,Father,violence,background,drug,difference,BOTh,wife,Mommy,Daddy,sale,Jail,California,Faustek,Tomasini,Schlager,luck,BIOLOGICAL,Gunman,Article,Police,FATHERs,inmates,blog,parents,stepfather

BEWARE! IF YOUR CHILD IS AN “INDEPENDENT THINKER” THEY MAY HAVE “PARENTAL ALIENATION DISORDER”

In domestic law on June 30, 2010 at 4:11 pm

RightsForMothersFILED IN: AMERICAN PSYCHIATRIC ASSOCIATION, AMERICAN PSYCHOLOGICAL ASSOCIATION, CHILD CUSTODY, CHILD CUSTODY BATTLE, CHILD CUSTODY ISSUES, CHILD CUSTODY FOR FATHERS, CORRUPT BASTARDS, CUSTODY EVALUATORS, DSM-V, DOMESTIC VIOLENCE, DR. PETER JAFFE, DR. RICHARD GARDNER, DR. WILLIAM BERNET, NONCUSTODIAL MOTHERS, PAS, PARENTAL ALIENATION DISORDER,PARENTAL ALIENATION SYNDROME, PSYCHOLOGISTS, CUSTODY EVALUATIONS, PARENTAL ALIENATION

I finally found the text of what Dr. William Bernet submitted for consideration for inclusion in the DSM-V, the diagnostic bible used by ethical psychologists/psychiatrists and Court Whores alike.   Dr. Bernet and some of the magical “50 professionals” (who all make a significant portion of their income promoting this) were recently at the Denver AFCC (Association of Family and Conciliation Courts – the father’s rights-leaning association for judges and court whores) conference and engaged in debate with Dr. Peter Jaffe and others about the so-called “parental alienation disorder.”  The text below came from that conference.

As one with multiple scientific degrees, I was very interested in seeing the proposal.  I found it to be more of a sales pitch instead of one scientifically driven.  What I found most laughable was on the diagnostic criteria it included “independent thinker phenomenon.”  Yes, it ACTUALLY says this towards the end.   How far out can these court whores reach to bizarro world?  What is scary is that if the DSM-V committee buys this drivel, the court whores and lawyers will be unleashed to destroy children and their families.

This proposal barely mentions that children may be come afraid of a parent because of the actions of that parent.  This includes seeing a parent abuse and beat the other parent, or maybe the child themselves.  The child may be sexually abused by a parent, therefore may not want to be alone with that parent.  Research has shown that the number one reason children refuse to visit a parent is because of the behavior of that parent.

The DSM-V has not been adopted at this point, nor is there any agreement that the following diagnosis should be added.


Proposed Text for Parental Alienation Disorder in DSM-V

DIAGNOSTIC FEATURES

The essential feature of parental alienation disorder is that a child – usually one whose parents are engaged in a high-conflict divorce – allies himself or herself strongly with one parent (the preferred parent) and rejects a relationship with the other parent (the alienated parent) without legitimate justification. The primary behavioral symptom is the child’s resistance or refusal to have contact with the alienated parent (Criterion A).

The behaviors in the child that characterize parental alienation disorder include a persistent campaign of denigration against the alienated parent and weak, frivolous, and absurd rationalizations for the child’s criticism of the alienated parent (Criterion B).

The following clinical features frequently occur in parental alienation disorder, especially when the child’s symptoms reach a level that is moderate or severe (Criterion C). Lack of ambivalence refers to the child’s belief that the alienated parent is all bad and the preferred parent is all good. The independent-thinker phenomenon means that the child proudly states the decision to reject the alienated parent is his own, not influenced by the preferred parent. Reflexive support of the preferred parent against the alienated parent refers to the pattern of the child’s immediately and automatically taking the preferred parent’s side in a disagreement. The child may exhibit a disregard for the feelings of the alienated parent and an absence of guilt over exploitation of the alienated parent. The child may manifest borrowed scenarios, that is, rehearsed statements that are identical to those made by the preferred parent. Also, the child’s animosity toward the alienated parent may spread to that parent’s extended family.

The diagnosis of parental alienation disorder should not be used if the child’s refusal to have contact with the rejected parent is justifiable, for example, if the child was neglected or abused by that parent (Criterion D).
ASSOCIATED FEATURES

Parental alienation disorder may be mild, moderate, or severe. When theparental alienation disorder is mild, the child may briefly resist contact with the alienated parent, but does have contact and enjoys a good relationship with the alienated parent once they are together.

When the parental alienation disorder is mild, the child may have a strong, healthy relationship with both parents, even though the child recites criticisms of the alienated parent.

When the parental alienation disorder is moderate, the child may persistently resist

contact with the alienated parent and will continue to complain and criticize the alienated parent during the contact. The child is likely to have a mildly to moderately pathological relationship with the preferred parent.

When the parental alienation disorder is severe, the child strongly and persistently resists contact and may hide or run away to avoid seeing the alienated parent. The child’s behavior is driven by a firmly held, false belief that the alienated parent is evil, dangerous, or worthless.  The child is likely to have a strong, severely pathological relationship with the preferred parent, perhaps sharing a paranoid worldview.

While the diagnosis of parental alienation disorder refers to the child, the preferred parent and other persons the child is dependent on may manifest the following attitudes and behaviors, which frequently are the major cause of the disorder: persistent criticisms of the rejected parent’s personal qualities and parenting activities; statements that influence the child to fear, dislike, and criticize the alienated parent; and various maneuvers to exclude the rejected parent from the child’s life. The behavior of the preferred parent may include complaints to the police and child protection agencies with allegations about the rejected parent.

Parental alienation disorder may be the basis for false allegations of sexual abuse against the alienated parent. The preferred parent may be litigious to the point of abusing the legal system. The preferred parent may violate court orders that are not to his or her liking. Specific psychological problems – narcissistic personality disorder, borderline personality disorder, traumatic childhood experiences, and paranoid traits – may be identified in these individuals.  Also, the rejected parent may manifest the following attitudes and behaviors, which may be a minor or contributory cause of the disorder: lack of warm, involved parenting; deficient parenting skills; and lack of time dedicated to parenting activities. However, the intensity and duration of the child’s refusal to have contact with the rejected parent is far out of proportion to the relatively minor weaknesses in the rejected parent’s parenting skills.

Although parental alienation disorder most often arises in the context of a child custody dispute between two parents, it can arise in other types of conflicts over child custody, such as a dispute between a parent and stepparent or between a parent and a grandparent. Sometimes, other family members – such as stepparents or grandparents – contribute to the creation of parental alienation disorder. On occasion, other individuals – such as therapists and child protection workers – contribute to the creation of parental alienation disorder by encouraging or supporting the child’s refusal to have contact with the alienated parent. Also, parental alienation disorder does not necessarily appear in the context of divorce litigation, but may occur in intact families or years following the divorce.

DIFFERENTIAL DIAGNOSIS

It is common for children to resist or avoid contact with the noncustodial parent after the parents separate or divorce. There are several possible explanations for a child’s active rejection of contact. Parental alienation disorder is an important, but not the only, reason that children refuse contact.

In the course of normal development children will become polarized with one parent and then the other depending on the child’s developmental stage and events in the child’s life. When parents disagree, it is normal for children to experience loyalty conflicts. These transitory variationsin a child’s relationship with his or her parents do not meet criteria for parental alienation disorder because they do not constitute “a persistent rejection or denigration of a parent that reaches the level of a campaign.”

If the child actually was abused, neglected, or disliked by the noncustodial parent or the current boyfriend or girlfriend of that parent, the child’s animosity may be justified and it is understandable that the child would not want to visit the rejected parent’s household. If abuse were the reason for the child’s refusal, the diagnosis would be physical abuse of child or sexual abuse of child, not parental alienation disorder. This is important to keep in mind because an abusive, rejected parent may misuse the concept of parental alienation disorder in order to falsely blame the child’s refusal of contact on the parent that the child prefers. Inshared psychotic disorder, a delusional parent may influence a child to believe that the other parent is an evil person who must be feared and avoided. Inparental alienation disorder, the alienating parent may have very strong opinions about the alienated parent, but is not usually considered out of touch with reality.

When parents separate or divorce, a child with separation anxiety disorder may become even more worried and anxious about being away from the primary caretaker. In separation anxiety disorder, the child is preoccupied with unrealistic fears that something will happen to the primary caretaker, while the child with parental alienation disorder is preoccupied with unrealistic beliefs that the alienated parent is dangerous.

It is conceivable that a child with specific phobia, situational type, might have an unreasonable fear of a parent or some aspect of the parent’s household. A child with a specific phobia is unlikely to engage in a persistent campaign of denigration against the feared object, while the campaign of denigration is a central feature of parental alienation disorder.

When parents separate or divorce, a child with oppositional defiant disordermay become even more symptomatic – angry, resentful, stubborn – and not want to participate in the process of transitioning from one parent to the other. Inoppositional defiant disorder, the child is likely to be oppositional with both parents in a variety of contexts, while the child with parental alienation disorderis likely to focus his or her negativism on the proposed contact with the alienated parent and also to engage in the campaign of denigration of that parent.

When parents separate or divorce, a child may develop an adjustment disorderas a reaction to the various stressors related to the divorce including discord between the parents, the loss of a relationship with a parent, and the disruption of moving to a new neighborhood and school. A child with an adjustment disordermay have a variety of nonspecific symptoms including depression, anxious mood, and disruptive behaviors, while the child with parental alienation disordermanifests a specific cluster of symptoms including the campaign of denigration and weak, frivolous rationalizations for the child’s persistent criticism of the alienated parent.

Parent-child relational problem (a V-code) is the appropriate diagnosis if the focus of clinical attention is on the relationship between a child and his or her divorced parents, but the symptoms do not meet the criteria for a mental disorder. For example, a rebellious adolescent may not have a specific mental disorder, but may temporarily refuse to have contact with one parent even though both parents have encouraged him to do so and a court has ordered it. On the other hand,parental alienation disorder should be the diagnosis if the child’s symptoms are persistent enough and severe enough to meet the criteria for that disorder.

DIAGNOSTIC CRITERIA FOR PARENTAL ALIENATION DISORDER

A. The child – usually one whose parents are engaged in a high-conflict divorce – allies himself or herself strongly with one parent and rejects a relationship with the other, alienated parent without legitimate justification. The child resists or refuses contact or parenting time with the alienated parent.

B. The child manifests the following behaviors:

  • a persistent rejection or denigration of a parent that reaches the level of a
  • campaign
  • weak, frivolous, and absurd rationalizations for the child’s persistent criticism of the rejected parent

C. The child manifests two or more of the following six attitudes and behaviors:

(1) lack of ambivalence

(2) independent-thinker phenomenon

(3) reflexive support of one parent against the other

(4) absence of guilt over exploitation of the rejected parent

(5) presence of borrowed scenarios

(6) spread of the animosity to the extended family of the rejected parent.

D. The duration of the disturbance is at least 2 months.

E. The disturbance causes clinically significant distress or impairment in social academic (occupational), or other important areas of functioning.

F. The child’s refusal to have contact with the rejected parent is without legitimate justification. That is, parental alienation disorder is not diagnosed if the rejected parent maltreated the child.

WordPress Tags: BEWARE,CHILD,INDEPENDENT,THINKER,PARENTAL,ALIENATION,DISORDER,RightsForMothers,AMERICAN,PSYCHIATRIC,ASSOCIATION,PSYCHOLOGICAL,CUSTODY,BATTLE,CORRUPT,BASTARDS,EVALUATORS,DOMESTIC,VIOLENCE,PETER,JAFFE,RICHARD,GARDNER,WILLIAM,BERNET,NONCUSTODIAL,SYNDROME,PSYCHOLOGISTS,text,inclusion,Court,Whores,portion,income,Denver,AFCC,Conciliation,Courts,father,rights,judges,conference,proposal,phenomenon,world,committee,drivel,children,parent,actions,Research,behavior,agreement,diagnosis,DIAGNOSTIC,FEATURES,allies,rejects,relationship,justification,symptom,resistance,refusal,Criterion,denigration,criticism,Lack,belief,decision,Reflexive,disagreement,feelings,absence,guilt,exploitation,Also,example,persons,qualities,activities,maneuvers,life,protection,basis,system,orders,Specific,problems,borderline,traits,individuals,duration,proportion,Although,context,grandparent,Sometimes,creation,workers,litigation,DIFFERENTIAL,rejection,development,events,concept,person,separation,caretaker,fears,beliefs,phobia,aspect,adjustment,reaction,discord,disruption,depression,mood,code,attention,disturbance,impairment,FATHERS,EVALUATIONS,psychiatrists,degrees,sales,criteria,lawyers,symptoms,scenarios,statements,criticisms,attitudes,complaints,agencies,allegations,skills,members,therapists,explanations,opinions,contexts,areas,parents,himself,herself,behaviors,rationalizations,ambivalence,refers,pathological,sexual,oppositional

WOMAN SUFFRAGE IN THE UNITED STATES

In domestic law on June 30, 2010 at 2:36 pm

THE WOMAN SUFFRAGE TIMELINE

WOMAN SUFFRAGE IN THE UNITED STATES.

The Nineteenth Amendment, called the Susan B. Anthony Amendment, was ratified by Tennessee August 18, 1920. It became law August 26, 1920. Women in the United States gained the vote in 1920 after 72 years of the LARGEST civil rights movement in the history of the world.

What are we going to do with it now?

IN THIS COLLECTION:

THE WOMAN SUFFRAGE TIMELINE
Do you know what REALLY happened?

ABIGAIL ADAMS’S LETTERS TO JOHN ADAMS
She: " We will foment a rebellion."
He:  "We will fight the despotism of the petticoat."
THE WOMAN SUFFRAGE TIMELINE BOOK LIST
References and materials used in preparation of the Timeline.
THE 1848 DECLARATION OF SENTIMENTS
The official commencement of the women’s movement at Seneca Falls, NY. THIS SITE IS NOT JUST ABOUT VOTING RIGHTS, IS IT.
Voting rights are not just about voting, are they.

THE ABOLITIONIST MOVEMENT
A comment on the the abolitionist movement
and its connection with woman suffrage.
Sojourner Truth‘s Ain’t I A Woman speech.

WHAT WAS THE E.R.A. REALLY ABOUT?
U.S. Commission Report June 1981

WOMEN’S LIBRARY OF HISTORICAL DOCUMENTS
Primary Source Documents; Women of Achievement

FATHERLESS AMERICA
The Childhoods of Historical Figures in American History

LIZNOTES:
Family Law in the United States


DID YOU KNOW: A little more than twenty years ago, married women in some U.S. States did not have the right to manage their own property, and all household property was deemed to belong to the husband upon divorce. 

DID YOU KNOW: Only a few short years ago, it remained legal in seven states for a husband to rape his wife.  

DID YOU KNOW: In 1981, the Federal Work Incentive Program, three out of four of whose participants were women, was required by law to give jobs preference to men, who also received jobs paying an average of 34% more per hour.

Husbands by law routinely were defined as "head of the household."

Hundreds of laws overtly discriminated against women, and
thousands of laws discriminated in effect.

Think by now it’s all been "fixed?"   Think again!


RELATED RESOURCES:

BASIC READINGS IN U.S. DEMOCRACY

DOCUMENTS FROM THE WOMEN’S LIBERATION MOVEMENT

LIVING THE LEGACY: 150 YEARS 1848-1998
Sponsored by the National Women’s History Project

link to U.S. Department of State Information PagesNATIONAL ORGANIZATION FOR WOMEN
Many articles, including:
Twiss Butler’s notes for a debate on feminism
(References at end to women’s rights histories.)
The intentional exclusion of women
from the U.S. Constitution
Chronology of the E.R.A. 1923-1996
ERA history timeline
NOW’s Current E.R.A. Campaign

NATIONAL WOMEN’S HISTORY PROJECT

UNITED STATES CONSTITUTION, THE
The complete text, annotated at Cornell University — and more

WITCH CRAZE TIMELINE

WOMEN AND SOCIAL MOVEMENTS IN THE UNITED STATES

WOMEN’S HALL OF FAME

WOMEN’S HISTORY LIBRARY | WOMEN OF ACHIEVEMENT
Documents formerly at undelete.org, being regathered here.

WOMEN’S RESOURCES AT THE LIZ LIBRARY

Blogger Labels: WOMAN,SUFFRAGE,Nineteenth,Amendment,Susan,Anthony,Tennessee,August,Women,LARGEST,rights,movement,history,world,COLLECTION,TIMELINE,ABIGAIL,ADAMS,LETTERS,JOHN,rebellion,despotism,petticoat,BOOK,LIST,preparation,DECLARATION,commencement,Seneca,Falls,SITE,JUST,ABOUT,ABOLITIONIST,connection,Sojourner,Truth,speech,Commission,Report,June,LIBRARY,HISTORICAL,DOCUMENTS,Primary,Source,Achievement,AMERICA,Childhoods,Figures,American,LIZNOTES,husband,wife,Federal,Work,Incentive,Program,preference,Husbands,Hundreds,Think,RESOURCES,BASIC,DEMOCRACY,FROM,LIBERATION,LEGACY,National,Project,ORGANIZATION,Many,Twiss,Butler,notes,exclusion,Constitution,Chronology,Current,Campaign,text,Cornell,WITCH,CRAZE,SOCIAL,MOVEMENTS,HALL,FAME,Read,Jerrie,Cobb,Mercury,MAIN,PAGE,References,SENTIMENTS,participants,articles,histories

(KS) HAL RICHARDSON-CRIMINAL PARENTAL INTERFERNCE, CONTEMPT, CRIMINAL CUSTODIAL INTERFERNCE, ABUSE, KIDNAPPING, HOSTAGE-and gets away with it!

In : PAAO, Parent Alienation, Parental Alienation and Hostile Aggressive Parenting Awareness Day, Parental Alienation Awareness Day, Parental Alienation Awareness Organization, Abusers Denier, AMPP-American Mothers Political Party, Australian Mothers Political Party, Angry fathers, Battered Mothers Custody Conference, Breaking The Silence; Children's Stories, child abuse, Child Custody, corrupt bastards, Court Appointed Parenting Evaluators and Guardians Ad Litem: Practical Realities and an Argument for Abolition, Court whores for profit, Custody Hell, Domestic Violence on the rise in shawnee county, Domestic Violence,Domestic Violence,Domestic Violence,Domestic Violence,, don hoffman jill dykes judge david debenham Dr. rodeheffer, Don Hoffman, family court corruption, Judge David Debenham, M. Jill Dykes, misogynists, mother rights, parental alienation, protective parent, Rape, restraining orders, woman haters. Jason P Hoffman,, Dr Richard Warshak, Dr. Richard Gardner, Father of Parental Alienation Syndrome (PAS) Committed Suicide May 25, 2003, family court corruption, Fathers & Families, Glenn Sacks, ACFC, RADAR, ANCPR, fathers murdering, Fathers Rights, Getting screwed by the Family Courts, Getting screwed by the politicians, Judge Richard Anderson Shawnee County Courts Topeka Kansas, Kansas House Representive Melvin Neufeld . Ks Wefare Summit, Kansas State House, SRS, CPS, Kansas Joint Committee on Children’s Issues on Nov 30, 2009 in Topeka, Kansas Legislature, Covenant Marriages, Domestic Violence, BULLSHIT LAWS, KS SRS Making money Jailing Children, Maternal Deprivation, Domestic Violence By Proxy, Motherhood, Motherless America, Mothers Rights, Murder-Suicide, PAAO, Parent Alienation, Parental Alienation and Hostile Aggressive Parenting Awareness Day, Parental Alienation Awareness Day, Parental Alienation Awareness Organization, Abusers Denier, Angry father, Parental Alienation Syndrome (PAS), PAS is a Scam, Speak Out, Susan Murphy Milano, Times Up, Defending Our Lives, on June 30, 2010 at 1:36 pm

I am STILL waiting for a hearing date to advance this… well I have been waiting 15 years for any justice—and I guess we will still wait longer. Now, IF I put the tribute Video of my dead mother and daughter up—I’d be in court in two days—( past experience)

AND, IN CONTEMPT AGAIN for —the powerful LOVE that is shown between three generations in that TRIBUTE VIDEO, LOVE HOPE & EMPOWERMENT

Recall they did not allow child to even attend her Grandmothers funeral. (re-listening as I hyperlinked to this-UNREAL brings me back down to the reality of the genocide)

But, I was found in Contempt. Daddy dearest as we all know—can beat the shit out of his daughters mother through out the years—and they call it as “MOM is not ‘co-parenting’. WTF"?

Yes this IS Justice. Raped, Blind folded gagged and rolled in the mud- then the gang bang begins again.

Welcome to mandatory shared parenting, and the abusers right lobby (aka fathers Rights, Parental Alienation, PAS whatever oppressive coined term of the day) to continue to abuse.

Welcome to the Fathers Rights Movement.

Welcome to hell.

American Mothers Political Party: coming soon:  www.AmericanMothersPoliticalParty.org

and-We Will Be Victorious

So Halleck G Richardson II, Owner of Minuteman Solar Film Topeka, Kansas. Your Reign of Terror can not last forever-

When I despair, I remember that all through history the way of truth and love has always won. There have been tyrants and murderers and for a time they seem invincible, but in the end, they always fall––think of it–always. –Mahatma Gandhi

That–and Karma IS a bitch. The Universal Justice.

 

01/29/2010 MISC. Petitioner in person and by Jason Hoffman. Respondent in person and by Robert E. Duncan, II. G.A.L., Jill Dykes, present. Court Reporter: Digital Div. 13. Motion #88 to find Respondent in Contempt and Motion #87 by Respondent to Modify Visitation before Court.

Evidence presented – Court finds Petitioner has failed to prove an intentional violation of Court’s prior orders by Respondent and denies motion to find Respondent in contempt.

Court finds minor child has serious concerns about parenting time with mother but they do not rise to the level that would seriously endanger child’s physical, mental, moral or emotional health per K.S.A. 60-1616(a). Further, reasons for ordering supervised parenting time in 2004 were not presented in the evidence, minor child is 15 now and it is in best interest of child that both parents have relationship with child.

Court orders unsupervised parenting time from 1:00 p.m. to 3:00 p.m. every Sunday, starting January 31, 2010 – exchanges at LEC, parenting time to be exercised in public within boundary of Shawnee County, Kansas. Neither parent to discuss divorce, proceedings or other parent with child. Respondent allowed to call daughter every Tuesday and Thursday between 8:00 p.m and 9:00 p.m. for 1/2 hour. Respondent to pay her remaining balance at Odyssey. Court will review case on March 2, 2010 at 8:30 a.m. to determine if parenting time should be expanded. Duncan to do JE. DBD

Soooo what has happened?? Ya think any part of this Order was followed? nope, custody hell in Kansas continues (Coercive Control)

DIRECT VIOLATIONS OF THE COURTS ORDER JANUARY 29TH, 2010

CRIMINAL PARENTAL INTERFERNCE, CONTEMPT, CRIMINAL CUSTODIAL INTERFERNCE, ABUSE, KIDNAPPING AND HOSTAGE

1. February 2nd, 2010 Tuesday 8:15 PM- CALL DENIED.

2. February 3rd, 2010 Wednesday- 7:39 PM- CALL DENIED.

3. February 4th, 2010 Thursday- 8:30 PM –CALL DENIED.

4. February 9th, 2010 Tuesday 8:00 PM -CALL DENIED.

5. February 16th 2009 Tuesday 8:30 PM –CALL DENIED.

6. February 18th, 2010 8:00 PM- CALL DENIED.

7. February 21st, 2010 12:20 PM VISIT CANCELLED.

8. February 23rd, 2010 Tuesday 8:30 pm- CALL DENIED.

9. March 2, 2010 Tuesday 8:30 pm –CALL DENIED.

10. March 4th, 2010 Thursday 8:29 PM- CALL DENIED.

11. March 9th 2010 Tuesday 8:45 PM-CALL DENIED.

12. March 11, 2010 Thursday 8: 50 PM-CALL DENIED.

13. March 16th, 2010 Tuesday 8:05 PM- CALL DENIED.

14. March 18th, 2010 Thursday 8:27 PM-CALL DENIED.

15. March 23rd, 2010 Tuesday 8:35 PM-CALL DENIED.

16. March 25th, 2010 Thursday 8:15 PM- CALL DENIED.

17. March 30th, 2010 Tuesday 8:05 PM-CALL DENIED.

18. April 1st, 2010 Thursday 2010 8:15 PM –CALL DENIED.

19. April 6th, 2010 Tuesday, 8:10 PM-CALL DENIED.

20. April 8th, 2010 Thursday 8:25 PM-CALL DENIED.

21. April 15th, 2010 Thursday 8:37 PM –CALL DENIED.

22. April 20th, 2010 Tuesday 8:25 PM-CALL DENIED.

23. April 22nd, 2010 Thursday 8:18 PM-CALL DENIED.

24. April 27TH, 2010 Tuesday 8:25 PM-CALL DENIED.

25. April 29th, 2010 Thursday 7:55 PM-CALL DENIED.

26. May 4th, 2010 Tuesday 8:30 PM-CALL DENIED.

27. May 6th, 2010 Wednesday 8:27 PM-CALL DENIED.

28. May 9th, 2010 Sunday Visit- Mothers dayVISIT LATE BY TEN MINUTES

29. May 13th, 2010 Thursday 8:05 PM –CALL DENIED

30. May 16TH, 2010 Sunday Visit-VISIT LATE NINE MINUTES

31. May 18th, 2010 Tuesday 8:07 PM-CALL DENIED

32. May 20th, 2010 Thursday 8:20 PM -CALL DENIED.

33. May 23rd, 2010 Sunday- VISIT CANCELLED.

34. May 25th, 2010 Tuesday-8:15 pm -CALL DENIED.

35. May 27th, 2010 Thursday- 8:28 CALL DENIED.

36. May 30th, 2010 Sunday Visit –VISIT LATE BY TWENTY MINUTES.

37. June 1, 2010 Tuesday 8:20PM-CALL DENIED.

38. June 3, 2010 Thursday 8:00 PM –CALL DENIED

39. June 6, 2010 Sunday Visit-1:15 PM VISIT LATE BY FIFTEEN MINUTES.

40. June 8, 2010 Tuesday 8:05 PM-CALL DENIED

41. June 10, 2010 Thursday 8:25 PM-CALL DENIED

42. June 13, 2010 Sunday 1:00 PM –VISIT CANCELLED.

43. June 15th, 2010 Tuesday 8:20 PM= CALL DENIED.

44. June 17th, 2010 Thursday 8:15 PM – CALL DENIED.

45. June 20th, 2010 SUNDAY VISIT- NO SHOW- NO CALL

46. June 22nd, 2010 TUESDAY 8:00 PM –CALL DENIED

47. June 24th, 20100 Thursday 8:15 PM-CALL DENIED

48. June 27th, 2010 SUNDAY 1:00 PM VISIT- DENIED

49. June 29th, 2010 Tuesday -8:10 PM- CALL DENIED

Parental Alienation Syndrome (PAS) Stuart Showalter Neo Nazi-Fathers Rights Advocate-Abusers Rights Advocate Glenn Sacks-Abusers Advocate,Right Wing Terrorist- Fathers Rights. Warren Farrell, Mike J Murphy, Jeremy Swanson, Mark K Godbey, Donald Tenn, Stan Rains, Richard A. Gardner coined the term Parental Alienation Syndrome

WordPress Tags: RICHARDSON,CRIMINAL,PARENTAL,INTERFERNCE,CONTEMPT,CUSTODIAL,ABUSE,HOSTAGE,STILL,justice,tribute,Video,daughter,AGAIN,LOVE,HOPE,EMPOWERMENT,Recall,Grandmothers,funeral,UNREAL,Daddy,dearest,Blind,gang,Welcome,Rights,Alienation,Movement,hell,American,Political,Victorious,Halleck,Owner,Minuteman,Solar,Film,Topeka,Kansas,Reign,Terror,history,truth,Mahatma,Gandhi,Karma,Universal,MISC,Petitioner,person,Jason,Hoffman,Respondent,Robert,Duncan,Jill,Dykes,Court,Reporter,Digital,Motion,Modify,Visitation,Evidence,violation,orders,health,Further,relationship,January,boundary,Shawnee,Neither,parent,proceedings,Odyssey,March,Soooo,Order,custody,Coercive,Control,DIRECT,COURTS,February,CALL,VISIT,April,LATE,MINUTES,NINE,June,Syndrome,Stuart,Showalter,Nazi,Advocate,Abusers,Glenn,Warren,Farrell,Mike,Murphy,Jeremy,Swanson,Mark,Godbey,Donald,Tenn,Stan,Richard,Gardner,generations,fathers,tyrants,murderers,VIOLATIONS

Neanderthals: Did they really die off?

In : PAAO, Parent Alienation, Parental Alienation and Hostile Aggressive Parenting Awareness Day, Parental Alienation Awareness Day, Parental Alienation Awareness Organization, Abusers Denier, AMPP-American Mothers Political Party, Australian Mothers Political Party, Angry fathers, Battered Mothers Custody Conference, Breaking The Silence; Children's Stories, child abuse, Child Custody, Court Appointed Parenting Evaluators and Guardians Ad Litem: Practical Realities and an Argument for Abolition, don hoffman jill dykes judge david debenham Dr. rodeheffer, Don Hoffman, family court corruption, Judge David Debenham, M. Jill Dykes, misogynists, mother rights, parental alienation, protective parent, Rape, restraining orders, woman haters. Jason P Hoffman,, Dr Richard Warshak, Dr. Richard Gardner, Father of Parental Alienation Syndrome (PAS) Committed Suicide May 25, 2003, family court corruption, Fathers & Families, Glenn Sacks, ACFC, RADAR, ANCPR, fathers murdering, Fathers Rights, Judge Richard Anderson Shawnee County Courts Topeka Kansas, Maternal Deprivation, Domestic Violence By Proxy, Motherhood, Motherless America, Mothers Rights, Murder-Suicide, PAAO, Parent Alienation, Parental Alienation and Hostile Aggressive Parenting Awareness Day, Parental Alienation Awareness Day, Parental Alienation Awareness Organization, Abusers Denier, Angry father, Parental Alienation (PAS), Parental Alienation (PAS), Parental Alienation (PAS), Parental Alienation Syndrome (PAS), Parental Alienation Theory: Amy J. Baker, Court Whore, PAS is a Scam, Speak Out on June 26, 2010 at 4:28 pm

anonymumsnews

Whilst scientists are debating over the time of their death and what they died of, a mens rights crusader has nearly won a lawsuit against the Oakland A over not giving him a mothers day hat. The judge has approved a settlement of $510,000. Rava has already won more than 40 discrimination law suits in America including Club Med for having a ladies only promotion, the angels for not giving him a tote bag and many other venues for similar occurrences. Even the reporterRick Reilly described him as,

"He’s a greasy manipulator who has found a small leak in American law and stuck an open wallet under it. When they wrote California’s Unruh Civil Rights Act in 1959 — the act Rava cites in his suits — they never thought soulless creatures like him would someday slink about the earth." Read morehere.

Reports of harassment circulate from domestic violence shelter owners, mothers group owners, politicians and researchers of similar types of abuse. It was as if an engorged adult claimed discrimination against world vision for providing food to starving children. Rava is not the only mens rights crusader that is opening up a loophole in the law and catching it with his wallet. Dads in distress have managed to cypher a million dollars in funding over a statistic that they don’t even cater for. The highest suicide rate in the population is young aboriginal men. The largest aboriginal population is in the Northern Territory and dads in distress only provide a service in New South Wales and Victoria. There have been so many mens programs that they now out number the women and if you take out the programs for young women; there is nothing.

The aim of dads in distress is to provide support through family law issues, yet there are no specific services for women going through the family court. Shelters and domestic violence counseling services are overloaded and are restricted in being able to support them through the family court. Some workers are restrained by funding or capacity and others are afraid of stepping on legal toes post shared parenting campaigns. Not only have these men attacked women accessing the family court, they have trampled on domestic violence victims and access to a much needed service. Richard Hillman, another mens rights campaigner tried to sue a child counsellor for taking protective action towards a child. The judge pointed out that he was asking him to put his duty of care above a child.

They have gnawed away at our systems and protections that give women and children the opportunity to be free from violence. When some of them died as a result of their influence, they justified their deaths and some even tried to use it as a reason to push more of their laws. The logic was, "Dad was angry and suicidal, I can understand that, just give him the child and control and it wont happen again".

Meanwhile on the other side of the world, young women die for speaking to another man or going out on their own – some die because they were raped. There might be a huge difference between the silent bloodshed that goes on within the home to the brutal public honor kills, but the rhetoric is no different and each egg the other on. It is the hate towards women, their autonomy and envy towards their ability to create life that drives these neanderthals towards acts of brutality and clearing all obstacles to commit those acts is their true agenda. There are many men like Rick, who refuse to be apart of such hypocrisy and very much a reason why survivors of domestic violence can and have loved again.

Parental Alienation Syndrome (PAS) Stuart Showalter Neo Nazi-Fathers Rights Advocate-Abusers Rights Advocate Glenn Sacks-Abusers Advocate,Right Wing Terrorist- Fathers Rights. Warren Farrell, Mike J Murphy, Jeremy Swanson, Mark K Godbey, Donald Tenn, Stan Rains, Richard A. Gardner coined the term Parental Alienation Syndrome

WordPress Tags: Neanderthals,Whilst,death,rights,crusader,lawsuit,Oakland,settlement,Rava,discrimination,America,Club,promotion,reporter,Rick,American,wallet,California,Unruh,Civil,earth,Read,Reports,harassment,violence,world,vision,food,children,loophole,Dads,statistic,population,Northern,Territory,South,Wales,Victoria,services,Some,workers,victims,Richard,Hillman,campaigner,action,result,logic,difference,rhetoric,autonomy,life,agenda,hypocrisy,Parental,Alienation,Syndrome,Stuart,Showalter,Nazi,Advocate,Abusers,Glenn,Terror,Warren,Farrell,Mike,Murphy,Jeremy,Swanson,Mark,Godbey,Donald,Tenn,Stan,Gardner,angels,venues,occurrences,creatures,owners,systems,protections,deaths,obstacles,Fathers,mens,women,towards

Man kills infant, points gun at state troopers · Double murder in Bath sheds light on domestic violence · Death of children raises questions …(NY State)

In domestic law on June 25, 2010 at 12:50 pm

Death of children raises questions

By: Bill Carey

Three children dead in just four days. All victims of violence. YNN’s Bill Carey says we may ask why and may never get an answer.

VIDEO->

NEW YORK STATE — A two-year-old girl, found unresponsive at her home in Oneida County. A victim of sexual abuse and then blunt force trauma, allegedly at the hands of a 13-year-old babysitter

"She deserves justice," said Oneida County District Attorney Scott McNamara.

Then, Steuben County. Late Sunday night. A 25-year-old woman and her three-month-old son, stabbed to death.

"To have something like this happen is just unreal," one neighbor said.

Then, again, Oneida County. Tuesday morning. A man shoots and kills a three-month-old boy.

"Why does this happen? We don’t know," said New York State Police Captain Francis Coots.

A murder is a murder. Any victim is a victim. But still, society recoils when that victim is a child and asks what type of person could carry out such an act.

"I’ve prosecuted enough bad people to know that there’s just some evil in the world," said Rick Trunfio, First Chief Assistant Onondaga County District Attorney.

Trunfio has spent 19 years as a prosecutor. He says that while some cases might be explained by neglect or uncontrolled frustration, other cases are just beyond explanation.

"When you get to the cases where a child is beaten to death or killed in a horrific way, then you’re talking about a different mindset, in terms of the person. You’re talking about a socio-pathic personality," Trunfio said.

Julie Cecile works full-time with victims of child abuse. In a nation where four children die each day from abuse, she still cannot explain what happens in the mind of an adult that would allow them to viciously attack a baby.

"They don’t value these, I consider them blessings. I mean, these children are vulnerable. They can’t speak up for themselves. There are adults who don’t value how wonderful these children are and the need for them to be protected," Cecile said.

Many will call now for the toughest sentences in these cases. There is no death penalty in New York, but there is life imprisonment without parole.

"I believe that there are certain circumstances where somebody who kills a child should never even have the possibility of getting out," Trunfio said.

Two accused men may grow old behind bars for the deaths of two children who barely had tasted life.

Parental Alienation Syndrome (PAS) Stuart Showalter Neo Nazi-Fathers Rights Advocate-Abusers Rights Advocate Glenn Sacks-Abusers Advocate,Right Wing Terrorist- Fathers Rights. Warren Farrell, Mike J Murphy, Jeremy Swanson, Mark K Godbey, Donald Tenn, Stan Rains, Richard A. Gardner coined the term Parental Alienation Syndrome

WordPress Tags: infant,Double,Bath,violence,Death,children,State,Bill,Carey,Three,victims,VIDEO,YORK,girl,Oneida,victim,trauma,justice,District,Attorney,Scott,McNamara,Steuben,Late,woman,neighbor,Police,Captain,Francis,Coots,person,world,Rick,Trunfio,Chief,Assistant,Onondaga,cases,frustration,explanation,mindset,Julie,Cecile,nation,Many,life,imprisonment,somebody,Parental,Alienation,Syndrome,Stuart,Showalter,Nazi,Rights,Advocate,Abusers,Glenn,Terror,Warren,Farrell,Mike,Murphy,Jeremy,Swanson,Mark,Godbey,Donald,Tenn,Stan,Richard,Gardner,deaths,Fathers,four,month

(LOUISBURG, Kan.) Timothy Lomax shot his wife, Danielle, and then turned the gun on himself

In domestic law on June 25, 2010 at 12:39 pm

Shooting Victim Leaves Haunting Facebook Message

LOUISBURG, Kan. — An unsettling Facebook message could reveal new information about what led up to a gruesome scene that left an area mother and father dead.

Authorities said Timothy Lomax shot his wife, Danielle, and then turned the gun on himself on Wednesday morning in their Louisburg home.

Neighbors told KCTV5 that the couple that was found dead inside the house had a rocky relationship. Police said they believe it ended with a murder-suicide.

Louisburg police evacuated the neighborhood just after 7:30 a.m. when they got a call about shots being fired inside the house at 219 N. Fifth Terrace. Officers from the SWAT team entered the house and found the man and woman in their 20s dead.

"They told me to evacuate and leave the house through the back door and officers were waiting back there," said neighbor Josh Loffler.

"Once we finally made entry, we found one male and one female dead," said Police Chief Ron Anderson.

On Danielle’s Facebook page, someone posted a message on June 2 saying, "I missing being a little kid, because there was never any drama, fights and the only man in your life was your Daddy."

Just before the shooting, someone in the house sent a text message to a baby sitter that said, "Come get the kids right away. Don’t want them to see what happens next."

The baby sitter managed to get the two children out of the house before the gunfire erupted.

Neighbors said they are sad for the sorrow the children must face.

"I’m a nurse, and any loss of life is tragic, but now two children are left with no parents," said neighbor Jeri Grove. "To lose both at once is not right."

Police said just a few weeks ago, they went to the house because one of the parents was concerned the other was going to take the children and not return.

Parental Alienation Syndrome (PAS) Stuart Showalter Neo Nazi-Fathers Rights Advocate-Abusers Rights Advocate Glenn Sacks-Abusers Advocate,Right Wing Terrorist- Fathers Rights. Warren Farrell, Mike J Murphy, Jeremy Swanson, Mark K Godbey, Donald Tenn, Stan Rains, Richard A. Gardner coined the term Parental Alienation Syndrome

NM Father who killed his two sons and self had Order against him for ‘excessive anger’

In domestic law on June 25, 2010 at 12:30 pm

NM man in murder-suicide had order against him

SANTA FE, N.M.—A northern New Mexico man who authorities say killed his two sons and himself had "excessive anger," his former wife wrote in a request for a restraining order 4 1/2 years ago.

Paula Martinez said in her Dec. 27, 2005, application for a restraining order against Melvin Martinez that he was threatening to take the boys away.

State police have said all evidence at the La Puebla home where the bodies were found Monday shows the 44-year-old father shot 12-year-old Derek and 10-year-old Devin with a handgun, then killed himself.

In a restraining order petition section asking what threats caused her to fear she might be injured, Paula Martinez listed "excessive anger, obsessiveness, threats, belittling (and) bad mouthing."

State District Judge Raymond Ortiz granted the restraining order on Jan. 10, 2006. He later extended it to January 2008, but a motion filed in November 2007 canceled it.

Paula Martinez also told the court that "Melvin suffers from severe depression and obsessive compulsive disorder. He obsesses about everything. He makes mountains out of mole hills."

Her petition said Martinez continuously belittled her, and once created a scene during a meeting with the older boy’s principal in which he was "full of anger" and "making comments on how stupid I was."

Paula and Melvin Martinez were married Aug. 25, 1992, and divorced in October 2005, according to court records. The custody agreement over their sons had the boys spending time at both parents’ homes.

State police Lt. Eric Garcia said Wednesday autopsy results on the father and sons are expected Friday or Monday.

He said all three bodies were found lying on the same bed, with the father between the boys.

A next-door neighbor, Flossie Montoya, told the Santa Fe New Mexican she saw Melvin Martinez mowing his lawn and getting rid of tree branches Sunday afternoon, Father’s Day.

She said she wondered the next morning why he did not leave at his usual time for his job with the state Department of Transportation.

Information from: The Santa Fe New Mexican, http://www.sfnewmexican.com

Parental Alienation Syndrome (PAS) Stuart Showalter Neo Nazi-Fathers Rights Advocate-Abusers Rights Advocate Glenn Sacks-Abusers Advocate,Right Wing Terrorist- Fathers Rights. Warren Farrell, Mike J Murphy, Jeremy Swanson, Mark K Godbey, Donald Tenn, Stan Rains, Richard A. Gardner coined the term Parental Alienation Syndrome

IF I WERE A GHOST, I COULD SPEND MORE TIME WITH MY CHILDREN

In domestic law on June 25, 2010 at 2:12 am

RightsForMothers

FILED IN: BAD DADS, CHILD CUSTODY, CHILD CUSTODY BATTLE, CHILD CUSTODY FOR FATHERS, KIDS NEED MUMS, KODI HAWTHORNE, MOTHER CHILD RELATIONSHIP, MOTHERLESS CHILDREN, SUICIDE

As I was reading the words of a young mother in Washington state who recently committed suicide, I was reminded of an essay a British mum wrote and I wanted to rerun it.  Kodi Hawthorne had her nine month old daughter taken from her in a horrific battle instigated by her ex-boyfriend Travis.  It was a hateful campaign to completely destroy her, and it did.  (Please moms, get help before considering suicide.  This hurts so many people including the children and it lets the bastard win.)

Back to the British mum…Marie is incredible at expressing the horrifying experience of children being ripped from their mothers by fathers out of spite.  Her blog is Kids Need Mums.

If I were a ghost, I could spend more time with my children – yet another nightmare dream

I woke up crying from a dream I had last night. The tears started during my dream: my dream-self was crying and as I woke up, I was still crying.

I had dreamt that I had become a ghost. My ghost-self was able to be anywhere that my children were – it felt wonderful. If they were asleep in their room, I could sit on the end of the bed and just watch them sleeping. If they were sitting quietly reading a book, I could sit next to them mouthing the words alongside them and watch the expressions changing on their faces when they read a funny piece or a puzzling piece or simply watch them becoming drawn into a fantasy world. A world where I was too. I could run outside and play with them, chasing after a ball or just cheering them on…

Nobody would notice, so nobody could stop me. No-one could tell me that I shouldn’t be near my children. I could spend all day and all night with them. If I was lucky, they might become aware of my presence in a positive way and just feel comforted that their mum was with them then they could sleep soundly, assured in the knowledge that my love was all around them even when I was not physically able to hold them and cuddle them.

No wonder I awoke crying…..it’s simply a dream and not a possibility…..

[Don’t worry – I’m not suicidal. Far from it, I would never do that to my kids and I feel no reason to do it since making a full recovery]

I dread going to sleep nowadays. Most nights I dream about missing my children, about them being taken away, about them being in trouble and not being able to help them, about having to witness their tears and not be able to wipe them away, about them growing up without me, forgetting that they had a mum. I can only sleep with a sleeping tablet and then I still wake up fretting with a dread in my stomach and memories of the dreams I’ve had floating in and out in the early hours.

I never tell the children I have these dreams. When they tell me of their own bad nightmares, they tell of dreams of me having my head chopped off or about being eaten by a giant spider or about being kidnapped and me not coming to rescue them. My youngest wakes up scared that I really have had my head chopped off and is constantly scared that her dream will come true. She’s fretting about whether I’m safe and whether I will die. No matter how much reassurance I give her, she’s not convinced that I’m alright. She’s often telling me that she loves me “to the moon, and all the way around the universe and every atom in the universe!…..” but then goes on to ask how much I love her, seeking constant reassurance that I do.

My son is being teased at school for the fact that his mum doesn’t live with him; they tease him in front of other boys saying “your mum doesn’t live with you” in a taunt, repeating it until my son has to walk away. What does he tell them? How does he explain? He can’t; he simply has to walk away, hurting. No other boy in the whole school has a mother who doesn’t live with her son. He has to nurse that hurt on his own. Unlike other children with divorced parents who can share their hurt, he can’t; his family story is different from everyone else’s. It’s acceptable to have a father living away, but there is no other mother who is……How does he explain that even to himself, let alone to anyone else….

No wonder we are all having nightmares; it is a nightmare, whether you are awake or asleep and there is no end in sight….this is not a dream, but a harsh reality that my children and I are living in and we won’t wake up to find that it’s just a dream…..it’s horribly real.

WordPress Tags: GHOST,COULD,SPEND,TIME,CHILDREN,RightsForMothers,DADS,CHILD,CUSTODY,BATTLE,KIDS,MUMS,KODI,HAWTHORNE,MOTHER,RELATIONSHIP,SUICIDE,words,Washington,essay,British,daughter,Travis,Back,Marie,spite,tears,self,room,expressions,piece,fantasy,world,ball,Nobody,knowledge,recovery,Most,tablet,memories,dreams,reassurance,universe,atom,fact,father,FATHERS,nightmares,whether,doesn

No way to live Women’s experiences of negotiating the family law system in the context of domestic violence June 2010

In domestic law on June 24, 2010 at 4:32 pm

http://www.bensoc.org.au/uploads/documents/no-way-to-live-launch-invitation.pdf

%d bloggers like this: